dear john who?

My heart and my mind forced me to believe that love equaled vulnerability and vulnerability equaled pain. Whether or not you’re good at math, I hope you realize this doesn’t add up. Obviously there was something seriously wrong in the way I portrayed relationships in every aspect. “Hit it and quit it” seemed to be a motto worth living by for a while. Boyfriends just seemed like a headache and girlfriends only became more helpless and pathetic in my eyes. To me, love was a joke with no punch line… but then you walked into my life so unexpected but yet with such perfect timing. You were such a breath of fresh air, not in the cliché way, but literally. Your breath and your lips weren’t “sweet like candy”, instead they were minty and refreshing. Your voice, like the sound of the waves crashing down, was so relaxing yet so exciting. The sun shined a little brighter and the grass grew a little greener when I had you on to consume my thoughts with. The butterflies in my stomach were finally able to dust their wings off when you came around me and even though you came into my life not too long ago, I can’t believe how quickly and hard I’ve fallen for you. What shocked me most was that you were actually there to catch me… an expression so trite and played out, I know, but so undeniably true. I want you to be a part of my life for as long as time lets us be together. No matter the type of relationship we have, whether you’re my boyfriend, friend, or just someone I can talk to on a rainy day. You grew on me, you grew on me the way a vine intertwines itself and wraps itself around and through the nearest object it can take over. That’s exactly what you did to me… our personalities intertwined with every word we spoke to each other and you slowly but surely took over my heart. Our bodies fit together like puzzle pieces, and for the longest time I was missing that section in my life. You’re like the last puzzle piece that after you finish the brainteaser there’s only one piece missing right in the center that just messes the entire picture up and days later you find it in the place you least expected it… like under a sofa cushion or in your dogs food bowl. I really did find you in the last place I’d ever expect to find a guy as incredible as you though. “Never meet a man at a bar,” everyone always says, but I did just the opposite. Its weird how things work, but everything happens for a reason. There’s a reason I walked up to you out of everyone in the bar, and there’s a reason you turned around and talked to me and kindly offered to buy me a drink in exchange for a dance. There’s a reason why now I’m writing letters to you from North Carolina overseas to Afghanistan. Everything happens for a reason and I happen to love you for many.